#Rethink: Christianese Phrases, Religious Trauma, and Connection
#Rethink - May 2022
Welcome back, friends! This month we are questioning Christianese phrases, pondering spiritual trauma and abuse, and exploring our need for connection.
Why Do We Use Christianese Phrases?
On the podcast right now I am doing a series on Christianese phrases--words Christians quickly say that people who don't go to church wouldn't understand. I asked my followers on Instagram and Facebook to give me some of their most frustrating phrases and they have delivered! (I'd love to hear from you too.) So far we've talked about "finding God's will," "God won't give you more than you can handle," and tonight the episode on "just have faith" will drop at 5pm EST.
Some Christianese phrases are just silly, most aren't actually Biblical, and many are downright harmful. So why do we say them? As I've said on the podcast, these phrases are often quick answers we can give someone when they share something that feels uncomfortably hard. The phrases sound spiritual and they make us feel better, but when we use them we are actually practicing something called spiritual bypassing. We say something spiritual so that we can bypass the actual issue. And that's not healthy for anyone! Not to mention it's also annoying and hurtful if we are the one getting bypassed.
On each episode thus far, I've taken apart the phrase, looked at the Scripture used to support it, and then reevaluated what Scripture actually says. Each time we've landed in a similar place of tension. Is this phrase true? Kind of, but also not. Truth always seems to be a place of paradox where we hold two seemingly opposite beliefs in tension. I'm discovering our broken world is rarely black and white, and I am learning to rest in the gray places.
Here is a link to all the places you can find my podcast if you don't already listen.
"The Lord Is My Courage: Stepping Through the Shadows of Fear Toward the Voice of Love"
by KJ Ramsey
I am privileged to be part of an advanced group of readers for KJ Ramsey's new book, "The Lord Is My Courage" which is coming out on June 21st. She is taking us slowly through Psalm 23 while telling her own story of religious trauma and spiritual abuse. KJ shares contemplative practices that are bringing her healing as she helps us seek the Real God who she believes IS love.
I literally cannot wait to read this book and dig deeper into my own healing with Jesus. I follow KJ and her husband Ryan on my socials and they are both such genuine, kind, gentle people who are speaking clear and often difficult truth. They understand the pain that Christians can inflict on their own because they've been there. But KJ and Ryan still hold onto hope because in the middle of their loss they have found a God who never let go.
An incredible amount of us are questioning, and deconstructing, and processing our own religious experiences. I love that I can point you to yet another believer who is acknowledging the pain and trauma we've faced without letting go of God or the core creeds of the faith.
It's very possible that you will hear about this book two months in a row. :-)
I Need Community!
It's been a couple of years you guys! Covid, selling our house, living with my mother-in-law for eighteen months, fixing up our new house, going back to teaching, etc. I've pulled back from many of the things I used to do at church. It was good for a season. But recently I've noticed a lack in my life. I miss people. I miss relationships. I miss sharing myself and hearing from others. I long for deep connection and a chance to be real.
So last Wednesday I did something crazy. I decided to join a random group of women that I'd never met from various area churches who were gathering at a coffee shop in downtown Grand Rapids. These women long to unite the Church across denominations and races around our shared belief in and love for Jesus. I long for connection with people like this. So I went. And friends, I found everything I'd hoped for...we talked, laughed, prayed, and felt the Spirit move. I needed this. We need this. This is the Church.
I know that many of us have been burned by church, and church people, and religion. But sitting around and sharing with these women who I'd never met--women who were different ages, and races, and from different backgrounds, but who all love Jesus in a real and tangible way--it was healing. It gave me hope.
I am going to be purposely reaching out for connection in these next few days and months. I have a list of people in mind from my own community, and I look forward to seeing what God does with it. Maybe you can also be brave, and crazy, and try something new too. We need one another, and God knows where those people are who will encourage you and be your Church. :-)
Thanks for taking a moment to #Rethink some of our religious traditions and beliefs. I know that it can be scary to deconstruct and reconstruct our faith, but finding the Real Jesus is absolutely worth it. As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts, questions, or comments.
If you know someone who would love to #rethink, please share!
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