Rethink: Truth Telling, God's Timing, and Being an Agent of Restoration
This month let's question the importance of truth telling, explore God's weird and wild timing, and ponder the difference between exposing and restoring.
Rethinking Faith: June 2023
Welcome to the June issue of Rethinking Faith where we will question the importance of telling the truth, explore more of God’s weird and wild timing as related to my book, Religious Rebels, and ponder the difference between exposing and restoring.
Why is it so important to tell the truth?
A couple of weeks ago I released a podcast episode talking about the difference between gossip and truth telling. It’s something I’m pretty passionate about as you could hear in my voice. A few days later I put these memes below on Instagram.
There’s a lot of awful truth that has come out about Christian leaders and pastors in the last few years. And I can’t help but wonder how much damage could have been avoided if it had come out sooner. If the people who knew refused to keep the secrets. If they loved the lost and broken who were being abused more than they loved power, money, or fake peace.
Bill Gothard—the leader of my cult exposed in Shiny Happy People—created elaborate teachings around how and when you could confront and expose someone. His teachings protected those in power—like himself—and limited options for victims. He even went so far as to create a teaching that warned against the dangers of listening to a negative report (even if it was true). All to protect himself. All to ensure he could get away with whatever he wanted. He’s not alone. I hate how much abusive leaders get away with in mainstream, regular-old churches.
How do we stop this?
How do we create churches that are safe for victims and dangerous for predators and power-hungry leaders?
How do we embrace Christian virtues like love, grace, and forgiveness, while also being “wise as serpents?” (See Matthew 10:16.)
Do we need to protect God’s name by staying quiet? And who are we truly protecting when we refuse to name the evil inside our own organizations and churches?
Speaking of Matthew 10:16-17, listen to it when read in context: “I am sending you out like sheep surrounded by wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. Beware of people…” Jesus goes on to tell His disciples that those people they should beware of will hand them over to persecution, imprisonment, and death.
It sounds terrible, but I really think that we are too trusting within the Christianese bubble world. Our glasses are too rosy. We always want to believe the best about everyone. And we stick our heads in the sand to do it. It’s not safe.
What is the middle way? How do we embrace the paradox and tension of being full of grace for broken people and maintaining awareness that broken people will sometimes do anything for power, money, and fame?
I don’t have all the answers, but I think it starts with being cognizant of the brokenness in the world (even in Christian communities), telling the real, hard truth, and protecting the right people—the victims not their abusers.
“What if God isn’t who we think He is? What if God cares more about our hearts than our outward actions? What if He wants to heal our deepest wounds and messes more than He wants our behaviors to change?” Christy Lynne Wood, Religious Rebels
This memory popped up on my Facebook today. One year ago I opened my book for the first time in about a year. This book that I’d been working on for the better part of a decade. I opened it again having no idea that one year later it would be published. Sometimes God does weird and wild things.
Religious Rebels officially launched on Amazon on June 15th and I had a little celebratory party with family and friends on the 17th at a local coffee shop. It was pretty special.
I’m at the point now where some people have actually read the book and I’m getting feedback. Not everyone loves it, and that’s okay. Books are subjective. Writing is subjective. That’s why I’m a math teacher. Ha! But many people have used words like refreshing and beautiful. Multiple reviews from my book launch team stated that reading the book felt like having coffee with a friend. I like those words.
Religious Rebels isn’t always easy to read. It covers some hard and potentially controversial topics. But if I’m coming across gracious and kind even as I ask questions that might be uncomfortable, then I feel happy.
I promise that this is the last time I’ll talk about my own book for a while. I will read other books this summer and tell you about them. :-) But if you want an autographed copy, you can purchase Religious Rebels directly from me at this link:
Or you can order it from Amazon. It still blows my mind that my book is on Amazon. What a crazy adventure!
Being an agent of restoration not just exposure.
I’m going to be very honest. The truth-telling thing is getting to me lately. I long to expose the garbage—the awful junk—that is happening in churches and organizations because I hate it. I want to be someone who tells the truth about abusive leaders and power-hungry pastors. Sometimes I dream about creating a volunteer based company that helps people who have been wronged and abused by exposing the truth: private detectives, wearing wires, getting footage, that sort of thing. But yesterday while walking along Lake Michigan, the Holy Spirit corrected and convicted me.
Although I believe truth telling is vitally important, my own heart needs to be intent on seeking restoration. My focus needs to be on restoring people to the beautiful relationship with God that is possible because of Jesus. I need to offer hope, not just criticism. I need to pose questions that open possibility, not simply seek to expose hard reality. I’ve been called to restore not just expose.
I realized that my heart was feeling calloused and frustrated. But as I reflected with the Spirit, I felt it begin to soften. Restoration requires truth. It requires exposure. But the motivation is different. I’m not only looking for abusive leaders to fall, I’m longing that even they find a restored relationship with the real God.
This is the heart of Jesus. I’m convicted because it is not naturally my own heart. And I am so grateful for a God who moves within me and changes things that I couldn’t and wouldn’t change on my own.
Thanks for taking a moment to rethink some of our religious traditions and beliefs. I know that it can be scary to deconstruct and reconstruct our faith, but finding the real Jesus is absolutely worth it. As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts, questions, or comments.
You can also find me on Instagram, Facebook, my website, and on my podcast Looking for the Real God. I’d love to connect with you on any of these places!