Loved it, Christy! Thanks for sharing this. You’re such a great writer. I grew up in a different era (‘60s and ‘70s) but I remember those culottes. Hated them! Loved your analogy of deconstruction using Lego building blocks. 👏👏👏😊
Thank you for sharing your story. I wish this was rare, but unfortunately, the older i grt the more stories like this I hear.
Mine is similar. It took until i was 45 to make the break, and it’s been painful, lonely and freeing.
I miss the tight social circle of friends I had known my whole life. I also see it as a closed club. And the group is dying out as they only grow internally.
I have found a more grscious and loving Jesus. One who won’t let me go. Who doesn’t judge my earrings, makeup or nailpolish, or condemn me for a glass of wine, or because I don’t read the KJV exclusively.
A Jesus who wants to be my friend and loves across denominational lines.
I won’t go back.
It’s heartening that others have found the wsy out, too.
I still have a hard time believing Im adequate, that my performance won’t be held against me. These are hard things to overcome.
You are welcome! It is hard to unlearn religious legalism. But as you say the real Jesus is SO gracious and loving that he doesn’t hold that against us either. Freedom is a beautiful thing!
I always marvel at the rules Christians have created to try to control each other, though they don't see them in that light. I grew up with a lot of them too, although different and not as extreme as yours. I think some of those Lego blocks are definitely not added with good intentions, but perhaps their creators aren't even aware of that fact or are in denial.
I grew up United Methodist, so I haven’t had to deconstruct like you have, but I’ve had a lot to learn about the details we all fight over which has definitely changed my faith. I’m (very slowly) learning that Jesus is way more loving and graceful than I've ever really believed.
Sometimes I’m very glad I grew up unchurched living a pretty reckless destructive lifestyle as a young adult. God chased me down in the movie theatre I was managing in 1974 when I was 24 years old through Billy Graham’s film “Time to Run”. I was so lost and desperately searching for something. I trusted in Christ and drank deeply of God’s grace and was saved to a lifelong journey of growing in that same grace these last 51 years. Ten years later after a call to become a pastor in 1974 and a Christian College and Seminary degree I became a Pastor for 40 years retiring from Pastoral ministry in 2023. Having said all this my faith has been renovated over the years as I’ve kept learning and changing some of my beliefs and understanding of God’s love and mercy. I’ve had people come to the churches I’ve pastored trapped in legalism and cultish like beliefs that I’ve helped in deconstructing and renovating their faith in the grace and freedom we have as Grace based followers of Christ. I so appreciate your writings Christy. Thank you.
My best friend has the same backstory as you, and she’s now been a Christian for about 20 years. There is such a purity in her faith and the grace and love she shows others because she doesn’t have any church baggage.
I don’t think you two are the only ones with this same story, and I’m so grateful for people like you for showing people like me (who were raised in the church and have some of that baggage) what it’s like to truly have freedom in Jesus.
Culottes! Oh yes, I remember them. As a boy, I didn't have to deal with them, but I remember the controversies over girls who wore culottes "too often," or whose culottes "looked too much like shorts." Of course, as a boy, I was not permitted to wear shorts, so I'd be playing backyard football in jeans during summer heat waves. There were so many rules, all of which were supposed to show Jesus to the world and keep our hearts safe from lust.
Oh gosh, I’d forgotten all of the judgement surrounding culottes. Too short, too skinny and pant like, etc. 🤦🏻 And I suddenly had a mental image of boys playing football and capture the flag in pants and collared shirts. 😬 What a crazy world we lived in!
Loved it, Christy! Thanks for sharing this. You’re such a great writer. I grew up in a different era (‘60s and ‘70s) but I remember those culottes. Hated them! Loved your analogy of deconstruction using Lego building blocks. 👏👏👏😊
I’m glad you enjoyed the first chapter of my book. 😁 Darn culottes! Haha!
Thank you for sharing your story. I wish this was rare, but unfortunately, the older i grt the more stories like this I hear.
Mine is similar. It took until i was 45 to make the break, and it’s been painful, lonely and freeing.
I miss the tight social circle of friends I had known my whole life. I also see it as a closed club. And the group is dying out as they only grow internally.
I have found a more grscious and loving Jesus. One who won’t let me go. Who doesn’t judge my earrings, makeup or nailpolish, or condemn me for a glass of wine, or because I don’t read the KJV exclusively.
A Jesus who wants to be my friend and loves across denominational lines.
I won’t go back.
It’s heartening that others have found the wsy out, too.
I still have a hard time believing Im adequate, that my performance won’t be held against me. These are hard things to overcome.
It’s a steep learning curve.
You are welcome! It is hard to unlearn religious legalism. But as you say the real Jesus is SO gracious and loving that he doesn’t hold that against us either. Freedom is a beautiful thing!
I always marvel at the rules Christians have created to try to control each other, though they don't see them in that light. I grew up with a lot of them too, although different and not as extreme as yours. I think some of those Lego blocks are definitely not added with good intentions, but perhaps their creators aren't even aware of that fact or are in denial.
I think there is more denial and cognitive dissonance than we want to admit.
I grew up United Methodist, so I haven’t had to deconstruct like you have, but I’ve had a lot to learn about the details we all fight over which has definitely changed my faith. I’m (very slowly) learning that Jesus is way more loving and graceful than I've ever really believed.
Only ever WAY more. 😊
Sometimes I’m very glad I grew up unchurched living a pretty reckless destructive lifestyle as a young adult. God chased me down in the movie theatre I was managing in 1974 when I was 24 years old through Billy Graham’s film “Time to Run”. I was so lost and desperately searching for something. I trusted in Christ and drank deeply of God’s grace and was saved to a lifelong journey of growing in that same grace these last 51 years. Ten years later after a call to become a pastor in 1974 and a Christian College and Seminary degree I became a Pastor for 40 years retiring from Pastoral ministry in 2023. Having said all this my faith has been renovated over the years as I’ve kept learning and changing some of my beliefs and understanding of God’s love and mercy. I’ve had people come to the churches I’ve pastored trapped in legalism and cultish like beliefs that I’ve helped in deconstructing and renovating their faith in the grace and freedom we have as Grace based followers of Christ. I so appreciate your writings Christy. Thank you.
My best friend has the same backstory as you, and she’s now been a Christian for about 20 years. There is such a purity in her faith and the grace and love she shows others because she doesn’t have any church baggage.
I don’t think you two are the only ones with this same story, and I’m so grateful for people like you for showing people like me (who were raised in the church and have some of that baggage) what it’s like to truly have freedom in Jesus.
I love how God uses all of our stories! Grateful for you as well!
Culottes! Oh yes, I remember them. As a boy, I didn't have to deal with them, but I remember the controversies over girls who wore culottes "too often," or whose culottes "looked too much like shorts." Of course, as a boy, I was not permitted to wear shorts, so I'd be playing backyard football in jeans during summer heat waves. There were so many rules, all of which were supposed to show Jesus to the world and keep our hearts safe from lust.
Oh gosh, I’d forgotten all of the judgement surrounding culottes. Too short, too skinny and pant like, etc. 🤦🏻 And I suddenly had a mental image of boys playing football and capture the flag in pants and collared shirts. 😬 What a crazy world we lived in!